To Mark

Becky is playing me songs
that she says are me and you.
And it's so true.
How strange it is that songwriters who
have never met us can know
everything that went wrong,
everything that went right,
and everything in between.
How do they know?
Did you sell our story?
I will wait for you,
living all the dreams over again,
trying to get over the pain,
trying to live again.
Looking for someone who is just like you
but who doesn't feel the need to inflict pain.
Looking for someone who is just like you
who can make me laugh,
who can love me for me,
who doesn't want me to cry all the time.
I'm looking for a facsimile,
because the real thing isn't there.
Never was.
never will be.
I want the dream you,
not the real you.
but I'll never forget you,
who you were
and how you made me grow up,
even when I didn't want to.
Mark, thank you for being you.
 
Yes, Mark, thank you for being a complete and total jerk who damaged my self-confidence so that every man I met after you was able to walk all over me even more than I let you.  Thank you for cheating on me with 3 other women, all at the same time (had the nerve to laugh about the day where he had sex with every single one of us, one right after another). 
 
First boyfriend, high school/1st year of college.  Don't miss him at all.